College & University Information

College Residence Life Staff: Speak to Gain Respect


When you speak, do residents listen or ignore you? If you're having trouble commanding respect, it could be the way you're saying it. Here is a list of words that can sabotage your effectiveness as a communicator. See if you recognize any of these red flags in your speech:

Should, Have to: These come across as condescending. Instead of telling people what they should do, offer suggestions. Then let them decide.

Always, Never, Everyone, Nobody: These words rarely paint an accurate picture and come across as over-dramatizing. You'll lose credibility. Instead, use words such as "sometimes," "occasionally," or "some people."

But: This negates everything that comes before it and can make you sound like you're talking out of both sides of your mouth. Replace it with "and."

Try: This is one big escape clause and makes others question your commitment. Don't try, just do it.

You: Starting sentences like this comes across as attacking and blaming. Instead, be accountable by starting with "I."

Okay: Tagging this word onto the end of sentences makes it sound like you're asking permission: "I'm upset right now, okay?" Lose it, or people won't take you seriously.

These changes may seem small and subtle, but you'll be surprised what an impact they can have on how people respond to you. You may also start to notice that when you react negatively to someone, it's because he or she has used some of these phrases.

Susan Fee is a licensed counselor and author of the college survival guide, "My Roommate Is Driving Me Crazy! Solve Conflicts, Set Boundaries, and Survive the College Roommate From Hell" (Adams Media). She offers my college survival tips on her Web site, http://www.myroommateisdrivingmecrazy.com


MORE RESOURCES:

Los Angeles Times

For some college freshmen, the first day of school comes a bit late
Los Angeles Times, CA - 11 hours ago
Robin Bohnen, left, jokes with her daughter Kelsi Bohnen, right, as Kelsi moves into her freshman dorm at USC. Robin has twins attending their freshman year ...


AFP

Ripon College president rethinks drinking age
Chicago Tribune, United States - Aug 20, 2008
AP RIPON, Wis. - Ripon College's president has signed a national initiative to reconsider the 21-year-old drinking age. Ripon president David Joyce is the ...
Video: Advocating Lower Drinking Age CBS
Consider lowering drinking age to 18, college presidents say Indianapolis Star
Group wants 18-year-olds to drink alcohol, legally WLFI.com
Tallahassee Democrat - Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
all 1,283 news articles


Loyola College in Maryland Changes Name, Angers Alumni
CollegeOTR, NY - 3 hours ago
By Mild-Mannered Rambler (Chief Contributor) The Loyola College in Maryland is changing its name to Loyola University Maryland in late August, ...
Loyola College to become Loyola University Maryland WTOP
all 17 news articles


Attic Theatre group presents a musical about suburbia
Oshkosh Northwestern, WI - 9 hours ago
Frugal fun has your name in lights up in Appleton Thursday. Those in the mood for a dramatic musical foray might take a romp with Attic Theatre, ...


College notes
BurlingtonFreePress.com, VT - 10 hours ago
The University of Vermont men's soccer team was picked to repeat as America East Conference champions. The Catamounts topped the preseason coaches' poll, ...
College roundup BurlingtonFreePress.com
all 6 news articles


Rome News-Tribune

Budget crunch could mean university layoffs, fee hikes
Atlanta Journal Constitution,  USA - Aug 20, 2008
By ANDREA JONES Layoffs, furloughs and hikes in mandatory student fees could be on the table for public colleges and universities next year, if the state’s ...
University System wants $2.45 billion next fiscal year Bizjournals.com
University faces larger than expected cuts Red and Black
Locked-in tuition may fall to cuts for Georgia Highlands and other ... Rome News-Tribune
Online Athens - Augusta Chronicle
all 37 news articles


WWL

A new suit seeks to reopen Tulane women's college
WXVT, MS - 15 hours ago
AP - August 20, 2008 11:14 PM ET NEW ORLEANS (AP) - A descendant of the founder of 1 of the nation's oldest degree-granting colleges for women has filed a ...
A new suit seeks to reopen Tulane women's college KATC
Descendant of 19th-Century Donor Sues Tulane Over Dissolution of ... Chronicle of Higher Education (subscription)
all 21 news articles


Laurentian University acknowledges Georgian College’s growth
Orillia Packet & Times, Canada - 1 hour ago
Georgian College’s Orillia campus will have even more students this fall walking it’s ever increasing hallways, according to Dave Dubois, ...


Bernardez: Inclusive education
Sun.Star, Philippines - 1 hour ago
By Dr. Roque Q. Bernardez THE SLU Institute for Inclusive Education was established at the end of 2006 to promote inclusive education. ...


Deaths & Funerals
Times Colonist, Canada - 2 hours ago
In 1960 Fred joined the newly established Faculty of Arts at Huron College, University of Western Ontario, where he was successively Head of the Psychology ...

College-University - Google News

home | site map
© 2006